


Visit

by imaginentertain



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Aaron doesn't cope too well, Liv is still Liv though, M/M, References to Abuse, Robert doesn't cope too well, and it's more than a little bit shit, and she's an absolute joy to write, basically Aaron is in prison, hints at professional misconduct/abuse, references to self harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-19
Updated: 2017-02-19
Packaged: 2018-09-25 14:31:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9824624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginentertain/pseuds/imaginentertain
Summary: One year's sentence.  That's two visits a month, 24 visits.  The deal is that Rob gets one to himself; Chas and Liv go with him on the second.How Aaron's time in jail plays out through visits and phone calls and his appeal.





	

**Author's Note:**

> So turns out writing a fic that's mostly dialogue is hard. Like REALLY hard.
> 
> Also thanks, Siri, for reassuring me it's not as bad as my brain makes me think it is sometimes.

**Settling in visit: week 1**

Robert put the last of his things into the locker and turned the key.  He patted his pockets, feeling the coins in place before his right hand moved to his left, twisting the rings there.  Waiting while the others in the room finished their same task and began to file out towards the visiting hall, Robert glanced down to the two bands.

 

_"They might let me keep it, Rob, but what if they don't?  I don't want it sitting in a bag in some safe for a year.  Just... take it.  Keep it safe and give it back to me when I can actually be your husband."_

 

He was directed to a table and he sat, waiting for something to actually do.  After what seemed like an age the prisoners started to file in and Robert scanned them expectantly, his face lighting up when he saw Aaron.  He stood up, his hands hanging nervously by his side.  What were the rules again?  Could he give him a hug?  A kiss?  Maybe not that, probably not the best idea to out him like that.

 

"Hey," he said, and in response Aaron pulled him into a hug.  Hugs: allowed.  Check.

 

"Don't look so worried," Aaron said as they took their seats.  "I'm the one in here, remember?"

 

Robert's thoughts flitted around their empty bedroom, the empty desk at the Portacabin, the empty chair at the dining room table.  He remembered.  "I miss you."

 

"I miss you too."

 

"I'm glad you're settled though.  You sound better than you did that first night."

 

"First night is always the worst.  Then you just get on with it."

 

"You don't have to just get on with it though," Robert said, his hands reaching out across the table.  He stopped, pulled them back a little.  "I'm still here.  I will always be here.  Every single day of the next year if you need me."

 

"Yeah, and I reckon I could spend every day of that year on the phone with the amount you put on my account," Aaron quipped.  "But thanks."

 

"If you need more let me know.  I might not be able to do much but I can do that."

 

"You're doing enough, more than enough.  And it's not just the money, it's Liv and Mum and the appeal—"

 

"The lawyers are all over that, by the way.  Reckon we have a good case for a sentence reduction; the full twelve months is a bit extreme given all the circumstances.  We should get a hearing date in the next few weeks."

 

"Bet that's helping Mum deal with this."

 

"She's fine."

 

"Liar," Aaron smiled.

 

"Maybe," Robert smiled back.  "I mean she's—"

 

"No, keep lying."

 

"Is this... is this a trick?" Robert asked.

 

"No, I mean...  You can lie to me about them.  Tell me they're OK, tell me everyone is fine and not doing anything stupid.  Tell me that things are fine and you're all missing me—"

 

"We are."

 

"—and that we will be able to forget that this ever happened.  When I need you to lie to me, lie to me."

 

"One condition," Robert said.  "You never lie to me.  At all.  Don't hide things from me, don't pretend that things are OK when they're not.  No matter what is going on with you I want to know about it.  Deal?"

 

Aaron paused for a moment then nodded.

 

"So.  How are things?  Really?"

 

"They're...  It could be worse," Aaron said.  "My cellmate's a decent enough guy.  Aggravated robbery, serving five years, done one.  He's got a wife and kids on the outside so he's annoyingly upbeat about things.  Keeps telling himself that they're not leaving him behind, that he's got it all worked out, got a family that loves him—"

 

"So do you," Robert pointed out.

 

"How is Liv?"

 

"Furious that I got the first visit."

 

"I'll see her in two weeks."

 

"You sure you just want the three of us on your list?  Adam's—"

 

"I can't deal with everyone, Robert, I just can't.  You, Mum, Liv.  That's it.  It's only for a year."

 

"Twenty four visits.  Well, twenty three.  And you'll be sick of the sight of me by the end of it."

 

"Not possible."

 

"Well Liv said to tell you that she's going to be on her best behaviour all year."

 

Aaron scoffed and shook his head.  "I'll believe that when it happens."

 

"It might do.  She's been really quiet and subdued.  Hasn't fought or complained on anything since... well, for the last few days.  It's... weird," they both finished at the same time.  Robert gave a small shrug.  "It's probably just her getting her head around things.  That, or there's one hell of a bomb about to go off."

 

"She's scared—"

 

"I got this," Robert said, his hand reaching back across the table.  He flattened his hand on the table, the two rings making a soft clink on the top.  "She's my sister too."

  
"Mum yours as well?" Aaron laughed.  "No, but it means a lot.  Thank you."

 

"Aaron," Robert breathed.  "I love you.  They're my family so of course I will be there for them.  I promise you I will look after them, we will be fine.  And when you come home we will be a proper family.  You, me, Liv.  Always.  I'm not going to let anything get in the way of that."

 

"I know.  I trust you."

 

Robert stilled at that, recognising the gesture and significance.  "So.  What's the protocol here?  I mean... are you telling people...?"

 

"I'm I being open about the fact that I'm gay?" Aaron asked.  "I'm not hiding it, if that's what you mean."

 

"I don't want to make things hard for you."

 

"It's not as bad as everyone makes out.  I mean, it's not like they're about to throw us a parade or anything, but so long as I'm... quiet about it I guess?"

 

"You realise this is putting a real dampener on the fact that we're newlyweds," Robert laughed.  "Anyone would think that you're ashamed of me."  Immediately Aaron's face fell and so did Robert's heart.  "Aaron, I didn't mean...  That was supposed to be a joke—"

 

"I'm not, I would never..."  This time it was Aaron who reached out, his fingers brushing against the two rings on Robert's hand.  "I'm not ashamed of you."

 

"I know," Robert said, moving a finger to hook over his.  "But if it kept you safe, made your life easier, I'd stay away.  For the whole year."

 

"And I thought you reckoned I'd be out before then?"

 

"You know what I mean."

 

"I do.  And if you ever even hint at staying away?"  He smiled, the mild threat running underneath it.  "I need you."

 

"You have me."

  
"Good."

 

 

* * *

 

 

**Month 2: visit 3**

 

"Liv was quiet.  And Mum was far too chatty."

 

"They're just getting used to seeing you in here."

 

"Trying to pretend it's not weird."

 

"That too."

 

"What's it like at home?"

 

Robert sighed, turning the rings on his finger.  To lie or not to lie?  One look at Aaron made his mind up.  "It's... quiet."

 

"You calling me noisy?" Aaron said, then he ducked his head as Robert grinned at him.

 

"No, it's just... I miss you.  The little things I didn't notice before."

 

"If you're about to say I snore or sommat—"

 

"No, but I never realised how much I used to just listen to you breathing at night."

 

"You know they lock up weirdos like you.  There's a couple on the row above me."

 

"Your humming in the shower," Robert said.  "The way you can't make a cuppa without clattering the mugs everywhere.  The huffing noises you make when doing the yard accounts."

 

"You notice that stuff?"

 

"I notice its absence.  I notice your absence."

 

"I miss you too—"

 

"I'm not talking about... well, obviously I miss _that_ ," Robert grinned.  "But I miss seeing that smile.  I miss waking up with you and going to sleep with you.  We all miss you."

 

"I miss you guys too.  I even miss Liv's strops."  Aaron saw the look flicker over Robert's face and sighed.  "What?"

 

"She's... well, the calm period is over.  Last week I got called into school 'cause she'd punched someone."

 

"Liv..."

 

"No, it's not that bad," Robert said quickly.  "It was...  It was a fun moment, turning up and hearing about how everyone has been on her case.  First her dad and then her brother...  She punched someone who was trying describe in detail what happens to 'people like him' in prison."

 

"Good for her!"

 

"Pretty much what I said too," Robert laughed.  "Right before I gave the school hell for letting it get that far.  I've threatened everything I can think of if I even hear of a single moment of grief Liv is getting because of everything.  Pretty certain I could get them on negligence or something, but I'm not having her being pushed to the limit because of idiots in school.  I... what?" he asked when he caught Aaron look at him.  "I said I'd look after her.  If this were Vic you wouldn't be like this."

 

"No, I know.  And I know you love her.  It's just... it's nice.  You two getting on."

 

"And all it took was you being sent down," Robert quipped.  "Adam said the same thing."

 

"You know he wrote me a letter?"

  
"What?"

 

"Yeah.  He wishes he could come and see me but says he understands why he's not on my list.  So he's going to write."

 

"Hang on," Robert said, sitting back in his chair a little.  "I've seen his scrawl.  How the hell did the prison system know it was for you?"

 

When Aaron laughed it was a real one, and for a moment Robert was content.  Happy would come in ten months' time, content was enough for now.

 

"How's everyone else?  Staying out of trouble?"

 

Robert looked at the smile on Aaron's face and he nodded.

 

"Everyone is fine and behaving themselves," he lied.

 

"Part of me was worried what they'd do to Finn after the verdict."

 

"We've got enough going on," Robert lied again, "no one has given him a second thought."

 

 

* * *

 

 

  **Month 2: phonecall**

 

"Do they always play that?" Liv asked.  "Saying calls may be listened to?"

 

"Yeah."

  
"So some guy could be listening in on us right now?"

 

"I take it Robert's not about?"

 

"He left his phone behind."

 

"Really?" Aaron asked.

 

"...No," Liv admitted.  "I knew you were callin' and I wanted to talk to you."

 

"Why?  Are you getting grief at school again?"

 

"What?  No.  That's all settled down.  Turns out Rob's pretty good at sorting stuff out."

 

"Why does that worry me?"

 

"Because it should," she said.  "He won't tell you but he's doing too much.  If he's not taking me to school or picking me up, making my head pretty much shit himself—"

 

"Liv!"

 

"What?"

 

"Language!"

 

"The guys listening will have heard worse."

 

"That's not... I'm not worried about them."

 

"I would be.  Bet they get a right laugh out of these calls."

  
"I... what's going on with Robert?"

 

"He's spending whole days at the Mill with Ronnie, doing all kinds of stuff he probably shouldn't.  Nearly took his hand off with some power saw or sommat.  And he's doing shifts at the yard with Adam, doing stuff with them trucks.  It's like every moment of his day needs to be filled with something otherwise he goes mad."

  
"There's nothing wrong with keeping busy—"

 

"But your family are making it like a million times worse," Liv said.  "I mean, I don't like Finn much but what they're doing..."

  
"Liv?"

 

"Nothing illegal for those of you listening in, it's just little things.  Like they can't get their cars serviced anywhere in like a 20 mile radius.  Chas has barred Finn from the pub and Jimmy forgot to pick up a parts shipment order for them.  Gabby spoke to Jacob who spoke to David, and now Finn's favourite breakfast cereal isn't in stock anymore.  I think that's my favourite."

 

"Why would they do that?"

 

"Because he was the one who called the police!  If he'd not—"

 

"Then Kasim would've and I'd still be here."

 

"You don't know that."

 

  
"I do, Liv."

 

"It's not fun, Aaron."

 

"Did you think it would be?"

 

"No.  But I didn't think it would be this shit."

 

"Language!"

 

"If the guys listening in complain then I'll listen."

 

Aaron sighed and shook his head.  "You know Rob will be mad that you stole his phone."

 

"Borrowed, listeners.  Borrowed."

 

"I miss you," Aaron said before he could stop himself.

 

"I miss you too.  I can't wait until you're home."

 

"Because Robert's driving you mad?"

 

"No.  Because I miss ya....  And because Robert doesn't think purple is an 'appropriate' colour for a bedroom.  So when you do speak to him remind him that it's my room, my house, and I like purple."

 

 

* * *

 

 

**Month 3: visit 5**

 

"...so in a few weeks you could be coming home."

 

"You don't know that," Aaron said.

 

"Come on.  Can we try and be a little positive?" Robert asked.  "Time served, tag, and you're home where you belong."

 

"What's going on with Finn?"

 

"What?"

 

"What's going on with Finn?"

 

"...nothing," Robert tried to lie.  "Liv."

 

"Does it matter?"

 

"What do you expect, Aaron?  They blame him for putting you in here.  The original plan was to kill him—"

 

"Because that's what you want to announce in a prison," Aaron hissed.

 

"What do you think I've been doing?  Trying to keep the Dingles in line is a full time job but they're doing this for you."

 

"No one made me beat up Kasim, and think about it.  If someone had laid into me you'd have called the police too.  I would have if it were you."

 

"What?  No revenge?  And there was me thinking I'd married a Dingle."  He smiled which widened when Aaron returned it.  "This is all for you, Aaron, so you just need to say the word—"

 

"And he's in Cain's boot and not coming out?"

 

"Or it's done."

 

"Then it's done," Aaron said.  "If I'm getting out next month then I need to be good, and I need everyone to be good too.  Finn turning up in pieces isn't good.  Leave him alone.  No more tricks or dodgy deals or petty behaviour.  Leave him be."

 

"OK," Robert grinned.

 

"What?"

 

"Think about it.  He knows what we're doing and so if we stop?  It's going to do his head in."

 

Aaron couldn't help but smile.

 

"What?"

 

"We."

 

"What?"

 

"You said we.  You and my family."

 

Robert inhaled sharply and ducked his head.  "I'll tell them."

 

Aaron couldn't help but smile.

 

* * *

 

 

**Month 3: visit 6**

"I was thinking we could go on another holiday?" Liv said.  "Like Wales, but better.  Not like you guys got an actual honeymoon—"

 

"And you want me to take you on my honeymoon?" Aaron quipped.

 

"I've been looking at those little holiday villas; separate rooms of course."

 

"Oh, this is the least of her plans," Chas said, waving her hand.  "She's literally covered the back room with brochures and print outs."

 

"I said I'd tidy them away."

 

"If they're not gone I'll tidy them into the bin," Chas snapped.

 

Aaron sighed.  "How is Faith?"

 

"Driving me mental," Chas sighed.

 

"Yeah, and you need a break," Robert said.  "Get away for a while."

 

"And leave Aaron in here?"

 

"Not like it's up to you," Aaron pointed out.  "You're kinda leaving me anyway."

 

"You know what I mean.  I see you so infrequently—"

 

"Mum—"

 

"That wasn't a comment, it wasn't!" she protested.  "You need your visits, I know you do.  I just...  I want mine."

 

"So if you went to Ireland tomorrow you could be back before the month is out," Robert said.  "He'd not even notice you're gone."

 

"I'll call if it'll make you go," Aaron said.  "Just leave a number and I'll get it onto my list."

 

"You shouldn't be worrying about me, love.  See?  This is why I didn't want to say anything."  She shot a look at Robert.  "He's got enough on."

 

"Oh, like that doesn't stop him worrying," Robert said.

 

"Seriously, Mum.  You need a break.  You're not good to me if you end up having another breakdown.  Who's going to keep Rob in line if you—"

 

"Hey!" Robert protested.  "I do not need looking after.  I'm the one doing the looking aftering...  You know what I mean."

 

"Fine.  Look after us and get us some drinks."

 

"Coffee, please," Liv said.

 

"Last thing you need is caffeine," Robert said.  "Aaron?"

 

"I'll take a coffee," Aaron smiled.  "Assuming it's OK for me to have the caffeine?"

 

When he'd got up Chas smiled.  "You know he's been brilliant?  Kept everyone going."

 

"So long as he stopped you guys going after Finn?"

 

"Yeah, we're listening," Chas sighed.  "Cain's not  happy about it, but he's listening."

 

"To Robert?" Aaron asked.  "Really?"

 

"He may be enjoying the part when he makes Finn think something big is coming," Chas laughed.  "I never thought I'd say this but... Robert Sugden?  He's... he's a good man, OK?  And I'm glad he's my son-in-law."

 

Aaron and Liv both pulled the exact same mock-surprised face which made Chas laugh; when she saw the similarity of it it made her laugh harder.

 

"Never thought I'd see the day where you approved of Rob," Aaron said.

 

"Mostly 'cause he makes you so happy," Chas said.

 

"Yeah," Aaron said, looking past them to Robert who was currently deep in conversation with some woman by the drinks machine.  "He does."

 

"You know Cain bought Robert a pint the other day?" Liv offered.

 

"That's pretty much the Cain Dingle seal of approval," Chas said.  "Especially since he didn't ask me to do anything to it beforehand."

 

"Wait, he was doing that before?" Aaron asked.

 

Liv shrugged.  "Ask me I think Rob's finally part of the family.  Even if it's not legal."

 

"What's not legal?" Robert asked as he brought the drinks over, carefully putting four cups down.  He pushed the coffee away from Liv towards Aaron.

 

"Your marriage," Liv said.  "So.  We doing the legit thing when you get out next week?"

 

"If and when we do, we're not making a big thing about it," Aaron said.

 

"Why not?" Liv asked.

 

"Because," Robert said, his fingers brushing against Aaron's hand as he took the cup, "we're already married.  Maybe one day we'll do the legal bit but it'll be more of a nip into town and do it kind of thing.  You OK with that?" he asked Aaron.

 

"More than OK," Aaron smiled.

 

"Just... lemme come, OK?" Liv asked.  "Even if it's a lunch break thing."

 

"And me," Chas said.  "No way am I missing my boys getting married.  Again."

 

The pluralisation didn't pass Robert or Aaron by, and they sat back and let the women plan the most extravagant simple registry do they'd ever heard.

 

 

* * *

 

 

**Month 4: visit 7**

 

"It's still a win, Aaron.  Six months, not twelve.  Five visits left over the next few weeks, that's it.  And then you get to come home.  Ronnie's pretty much done with the Mill, managed to talk Liv down from purple to a more lilac colour.  She can dress it up how she wants but at least we won't need to repaint in four or five years when she's fed up of it.

 

"Chas says it just gives her a chance to have a proper breather.  Managed to convince her to go to Ireland, but she swears she'll be home before the next visit.  Adam's busy writing another letter, so there's that.  Vic told me that he was asking for help because everything he wrote down sounded lame somehow.  Her advice was to just write that because it's what he wants to say so he should say it.

 

"The yard's doing well, we've taken on an apprentice.  Some lad from Hotten college does a few days a week.  He's not taking your job, don't worry about that, but it's going to give you – give us some time together in a few weeks.  You won't need to rush back or dive straight in.  Plus it means we're doing good, yeah?  More people?  Home James is on the up too but I don't think Nicola will let me employ an apprentice.  Says she's got enough training me and Jimmy up.

 

"Liv...  She's better than she was in court.  Calmed down.  I've told her that if she can stay out of trouble over the next couple of months then we'll think about taking her on that villa holiday.  I've got some forms I need to fill out for the parole guys about it for your tag, think they'll accept 'delayed honeymoon' as a reason for you to be away from home for a few nights?

 

"Speaking of forms, there's something else."  There was a pause.  "So this Greece trip she wants to go on?  Well the school had a bit of a moment about there being no legal guardian.  Like, they're fine but the local authority are talking about getting people involved because informal arrangements should be temporary?  Well, I've spoken to Liv about you and me getting a proper residency order for her.  Making it all formal.  I'm happy to do it, I want to do it.  You know I love her and I think even she's coming to accept that over these last few months.  So shall I go ahead?  Speak to a solicitor?  I don't think we have to wait until you're out for that, he can come in here for you to sign any paperwork.  Maybe he can actually  get you to say something," Robert finished on.  "I know it's hard, Aaron, but—"

 

"You have no idea," Aaron said quietly.  "I feel like I'm going mad in here, the same four walls, the same routine.  Being without you or Liv, not being able to do the things that I want to do, the things I used to do.  It's like some other life, one that I almost believed I'd have back by now.  And I know things are better; I'd much rather six months than twelve.  But there's more to it than that.

 

"My cellmate's wife left him.  Something about not being able to cope.  It's not about you, or us," he said, cutting off Robert's obvious conclusion, "but things are... hard, right now.  He was so supportive of me in the run up to the appeal and I can't do anything for him in return.

 

"Being helpless like this...  You know how much I hate it.  Stuck in here, seeing you every two weeks, Mum and Liv once a month.  Hearing about the Mill and Liv's school and the pub and the family...  It's all at a distance, like I'm not a part of that life any more.  I feel like I'm going slowly mad."

 

Aaron's hand drifted to his forearm, rubbing against the material there.

 

"Remember, you promised to never lie to me," Robert said quietly, fearfully, his eyes fixed on Aaron's arm.

 

"I knocked it this morning getting out of bed," Aaron said, pulling the sleeves down further to clench in his fist.  "It's hard, but I'm coping.  I promise."

 

"You're still a part of our lives, Aaron, you always will be.  Call me, every day.  If we can fix a time then I can have everyone there and you'll hear—"

 

"It's hard enough getting to a phone at all," Aaron said, "it'll be impossible to book a regular daily slot."

 

"Aaron—"

 

"You wanted the truth, there it is.  Right now it may as well be two and a half years the way it feels."

 

The rest of the visit was filled with painful small talk and a muted promise to see each other in two weeks' time.

 

On his way out he stopped off at the desk.  "I need to speak to someone about my husband, Aaron Dingle.  I'm worried about him."

 

 

* * *

 

 

**Month 4: phonecall**

 

"You know what?  I'm glad I got your voicemail, Robert.  Thanks to you I'm making this call with a guard standing over my shoulder.  I'm one step above suicide watch and they've stripped out my cell of anything that I could use to harm myself.  I tell you I knock my arm and you immediately think I'm...  I thought you knew me better than that, I thought I knew you better than that.  This is hard enough without you making it harder, so I'm going to make things easy.  As of today you're off my visitor list.  See you in a couple of months.  Maybe."

 

 

* * *

 

 

**Month 4: visit 8**

 

"Just me," Liv said as she caught Aaron glancing over her shoulder.  "Chas is still in Ireland, sommat about ferries or whatever."

 

"So you came alone?"

 

"Someone's gotta talk sense into you."

 

"Liv—"

 

"You went on and on about how we don't get what it's like for you in here but you have no idea what it's like for us out there.  So, here's a quick recap on what you are missing.

 

"Robert is doing everything he can to keep life as normal as possible.  I didn't exactly make it easy for him but he's stuck it out.  He's doing all this custody stuff and while it's not legal yet he's pretty much daring anyone to tell him otherwise.  He's signing forms and stuff for school and I'm going on this week-long trip to Greece in the summer.  I get to do all this cool stuff and that's because of Rob.  We both know he's got a million reasons to drop me and only one to keep me, but I'm still here.

 

"The Mill's pretty much done too.  He's been working with Ronnie, doing a lot of stuff for your room.  Stupid, personal stuff for the two of you.  The place is amazing, Aaron.  We're not moving in until you're home, we all go in together, but we could be there now.  You'd not recognise it.  And the other flat is really nice too, almost wish we'd kept it as one house.  But he's made us a home, Aaron.  After everything we've been through he's giving us a home, a proper home.

 

"Between the house and the yard and the trucks I think the only time he's not been working or doing stuff for the family is that hour he's here, with you.  He's so busy all the time and the only time he's not is when he's with you.  That's the only time he sits and stops and I've seen it, first hand.  He sits here with me and Chas and he shares this time and never once complains.  The rest of the time he has to keep busy because I reckon he'll go mad otherwise.

 

"I mean, you know him.  How do you think he's coping?  He's not, Aaron.  He loves you so much and he misses you.  So yeah, you say about a bumped arm and going mad?  We all thought the same thing when he told us and he didn't even leave the building without trying to do something about it."

  
"But—"

 

"I get one hour, you're listening," she cut across.  "I was scared enough about you topping yourself and he still sat me down, told me what you'd said, treated me like a proper adult.  He didn't have to do that but he wanted me to know so that I'd know what to expect in case you were bad today.  Instead you're sitting there, just fine, and Robert is now the one going mad.

 

"Get your head out of your arse and put Robert back on your list.  Give him the next visit because even though Chas has missed this one she's willing to miss the next one because this is pretty much the only thing we reckon will stop him having a complete breakdown."

 

"Anything else?"

 

"Yeah.  The trip to Greece is going through France so you need to teach me some French phrases.  Preferably how to order some wine."

 

 

* * *

 

 

**Month 5: visit 9**

 

"You were right to be worried."  Aaron wasn't even at his chair when he started speaking, and at his introduction Robert sat back down.  "And I'm sorry for shutting you out."

 

Robert hadn't moved, hadn't made a single sign that he wanted to do anything except sit there.

 

"My cellmate, the guy I've been talking about?  He's the kind of guy who can... get things.  And he got a blade," Aaron added, dropping his voice as low as he could.  "I didn't, I swear I didn't.  But a part of me... thought about it.  For the first time since I told you about my dad, I wanted to.  I just wanted to come home and I couldn't and I felt lost, Rob.  I was scared and lost... and you saw that.

 

"Every other time I've felt like this I've been on my own and this time I wasn't.  And not for the first time I realised just how lucky I am to have you in my corner, to have the kind of relationship where someone has my back no matter what."

 

"You doubted that?" Robert asked.

 

"I doubted whether you'd come back," Aaron admitted.  "If you'd want to come back after what I said."

 

"I didn't leave," Rob said.  "What?  You think Liv hitched here the other week?  I sat out in the car park, did some paperwork, made some calls.  I just waited for her.  Didn't ask her what you two talked about but...  I told her that I'd bring her to every visit, make sure there was always money in your account.  I'd have been here, Aaron, even if you didn't want me."

 

"I do want you," Aaron said, sitting forward and reaching out to him.  "I...  I'm sorry."

 

"You can't push me away, Aaron.  It was bad enough when you did it out there but not in here.  You can't, not now."

 

"I don't want to," Aaron said, "I don't.  I want my husband and my sister and our home.  I want a... a nice dinner out and some beers and for us to not to be disturbed for a night," he added with a grin.

  
"I want you to stop acting like I'm the enemy," Robert said, making no move to close the gap between them.  "Stop pushing me away."

 

"Don't let me.  If I try, fight me."

 

"I will always fight for us, Aaron, but I can't do this by myself."

 

"I know, I know.  I hate being away from you, feeling... disconnected from us."

 

"But you're not," Robert said, finally reaching out and taking Aaron's hands in his.  "You are still my husband, you are still Liv's brother, Chas' son.  You will always be a part of our family."

 

"Too much time to think in here," Aaron said, his thumb running up and down Robert's.

 

"So think about this.  Think about our home and all our things already in place by the time you get out.  Photos and pictures on the wall, all you need to do is walk through the door and you're home.  Think about the drinks everyone's waiting to buy you and the nights we'll spend with our friends and families.  Think about the nights you and I will spend together."

 

"I already have a few ideas about that," Aaron grinned.  Then his face fell.  "They know.  In here.  About my dad, about what he did...  Nothing stays secret in a place like this I guess.  Turns out there is something worse than being gay in prison and that's being the son of—"

 

"You were the victim!"

 

"You say that like the truth matters in these situations.  It's fine, nothing's happened."

 

"Yet."

 

"Rob, you can't do anything.  Please don't do that to me again."

 

"But if you're being threatened by prisoners..."  Robert stopped when someone walked past their table, a simple walk-round, but the way Aaron reacted was enough.  "Are you kidding me?"

 

"Apparently most of it is about them finding him.  I think a few actually believe his lies.  But I'm not giving them a reason to do anything, Robert, I promise.  Head down, get on with things, smile and be nice."

 

"That's a challenge then," Robert quipped, trying to lighten the mood and to push down the fear that was welling up inside him.

 

"I have six weeks left, Robert, I can do six weeks.  But I can't if you make it so that they're standing over my shoulder the whole time."

 

"I can't just leave you like this."

 

"You can't exactly stay and keep an eye on me either."

  
"You have to call me if it gets too much," Robert said.  "I can speak to the lawyers, we can... I don't know.  Transfer you or get an earlier release date."

 

"Because that conversation won't get flagged up."

 

"So ask me how Faith's doing.  When you call, if you ask me how Faith is, I'll know what you mean.  Promise me you'll call, Aaron.  You won't try to stick it out or see if it gets better or think you can handle this yourself."

 

"I can handle myself."

 

"I know you can, but you don't have to do this by yourself.  That's kinda the point of getting married."

 

"I wish we could have a honeymoon.  That's something else I've—"

 

"Don't you dare finish that sentence," Robert warned.  "OK, so Vegas—"

 

"—Or Ibiza—"

 

"—might be out, but that doesn't mean we're out of options.  Leave it with me, OK?"

 

"OK."

 

"No more lies, Aaron.  From either of us.  No matter if we think it's for the best."

 

"OK," Aaron agreed.  "But I'm going first."

 

"What?"

 

"How are _you_?"

 

 

* * *

 

 

**Month 6: visit 11**

 

"I got confirmation of your release date yesterday," Robert said.

 

"Bet Mum's already planning the party?"

 

"I'm under instructions to say 'Absolutely not' should you ask."

 

"Right," Aaron smiled.  "Did you also hear about—?"

 

"I've made your first appointment already," Robert finished.  "He's good, highly recommended."

 

"So long as he's court approved I don't see a problem."

 

"It was quite a list I was given."  Off Aaron's look he explained.  "I asked for a list that covered pretty much covers the whole of Yorkshire.  I don't care where we go so long as it helps you."

 

"You're already planning days out, aren't you?"

 

"Six months is a long time, Aaron, I've missed spending time with you."

 

"Fine," Aaron laughed softly.  "But my curfew is going to be pretty strict—"

 

"I know, I know.  You'll be home by eight, on the dot.  Got plans for nights in too."

 

"I bet.  Shame it's not what I'd like though."

 

"Really?"

 

"Yeah," Aaron said.  "You know that Leeds steakhouse?  Proper food, beers, bars, beers, a hotel room—"

 

"Beers?" Robert finished.

 

"I want a beer, Robert.  I miss beer."

 

"Fine, you will have a beer when you get out."

 

"But it can't be one of your fancy hotel rooms, Rob.  I don't need that."

 

"You know that your mum and Liv won't want to let you out of their sight?"

 

"I know.  I'm bracing myself for weeks of fussing."

 

"Well, at least your mum will have to do it from a distance.  The Mill is finally done, everything's in, we're just waiting for you.  All of your stuff, most of mine and Liv's.  I feel like I'm back with my sister, living out of a case and having nothing of mine about the place, but it's worth it.  You know Liv won't even let me do meals there?  We're doing things for the first time when you're home."

 

"And the party?"

 

"Second night," Robert said.  "Liv is laying down the law about us having time together as a family first."

 

"Speaking of family," Aaron said, "how is Victoria?"

 

"Hoping that the morning sickness will end soon.  They're not telling anyone yet, not until three months, but it's becoming a bit of an open secret in the village.  Adam's walking around with the biggest grin on his face it's all I can do not to wipe it off."

 

"I thought you'd be happy for them?  You're going to be an uncle again."

 

"Yeah, but this is my little sister we're talking about," Robert said.  "You'll know what it feels like when Liv tells you she's pregnant."

 

"Not a chance.  Liv is going nowhere near boys until she's at least... thirty."

 

"Good luck with that," Robert grinned.  "But yeah.  Being an uncle again... it'll be nice.  You'll love it, it's the best thing.  I'm actually getting to be that for Jack and Sarah this time; think Debbie feels a bit better about things seeing as we're family now."

 

"She must be relieved, they were trying for long enough.  Bet Adam was going mental over not getting her... you know..."  When Robert glanced away, Aaron pressed on.  "What?"

 

"I...  Vic said that Adam actually refused to keep trying until you had a release date.  Said he didn't want to have a kid unless you were there to be its uncle from the start."

 

"I'm only going to be their uncle through marriage," Aaron said, slightly confused.

 

"You can't really think that," Robert said.  "Vic and I joke about the fact that we've pretty much married brothers.  You'd have been this baby's uncle no matter what you and I were to each other."

 

"So he waited?  For me?"  Aaron sighed and looked down at his clasped hands.  "Everyone's put their lives on hold—"

 

"Oh no, no, no, you don't get to turn this into a guilt trip.  Aaron—"

 

"You and Liv aren't in the flat, Adam and Vic put off having a baby?  When I get out on a tag I won't be able to do so many things and we have no chance of having an actual honeymoon for a while."

 

"Why do you think that you're so insignificant to our lives that we can just get on without you like nothing's happened?" Robert challenged.  "We miss you.  All of us."

 

"I miss you."  He reached out across the table, taking Robert's left hand in his.  He rubbed his fingers across the double band on Robert's fingers.  "I want this back."

 

"The day you get out, I promise."

 

"Can't wait."

 

 

* * *

 

 

**End of month six: release day**

 

Aaron signed the last of the forms and took his offered bag.  His solicitor reminded him, once again, of the conditions of his release and the curfew imposed through the tag.  Taking a deep breath Aaron followed him through the doors that stood between him and the world: between him and his family.

 

They were there, waiting for him.  Aaron was last out behind two others who had served their time and he couldn't help but smile as he watched Liv bouncing up and down on the balls of her feet, looking at each face expectantly.

 

When she saw him he barely had time to thank his solicitor before all of her five-foot-nothing body was slammed into his, her arms wrapping tightly around his waist.

 

"Missed you," she mumbled into his hoodie.

 

"Missed you too," Aaron replied, pressing a kiss into her hair.

 

"I'm so glad you're OK," she said, stepping back and taking his hand, pulling him over to the waiting car.  Cars, as Aaron soon realised.

 

"C'm'ere, you," Chas said, pulling Aaron from Liv's grasp and into her own embrace.  "You're too thin."

 

"I'm sure Marlon will fix that," Aaron said, glancing over at Robert who hadn't said anything, hadn't moved from where he was leaning up against the side of his car.

 

"OK, I'm done," Chas said, pulling back just enough so she could hold his face in her hands.  "Go say hi to your husband."

 

It wasn't some rush, some Hollywood cinematic moment.  They moved into each other's orbit with restraint before Robert's arms were around Aaron's waist and Aaron's around Robert's neck and they silently held onto the other, breathed in the other, and took in the moment.

 

"Hey," Robert whispered, just loud enough for Aaron to hear him.

 

"Hey."

 

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Chas said.  "Lemme have one more hug before we go."  She put a hand on Aaron's shoulder, pulling him away from Robert and back towards her.  This time Aaron's arm stayed outstretched, a hand clasped in Robert's.  "Right, OK.  That'll see me through until tomorrow."

 

"Tomorrow?" Aaron asked as Chas released him and Robert pulled him back.

 

"We may have... accidentally on purpose told everyone you're coming home tomorrow," Liv explained.

 

"Why?"

 

"Because you wanted a night away," Robert explained, speaking for the first time.

 

"My curfew—"

 

"Already cleared.  We petitioned the court yesterday to allow one night in lieu of the honeymoon we didn't get to have," Robert explained.  "I've booked us a table at the steakhouse but we need to be at the hotel by eight so no luck on the bars, sorry."

 

"I think we'll cope," Aaron said with a grin.

 

"We'll see you tomorrow," Liv said.  "Behave yourselves, OK?"

 

"Best behaviour," Aaron said.

 

"I hope not," Robert said quietly.  Once the other car had pulled away Aaron turned around to face Robert.  "You ready?"

 

"Nearly," Aaron said.  "One thing I need to do first."

 

He closed the gap between them, pressing a simple kiss to Robert's lips.  "Thank you.  I wouldn't have made it without you."

 

"You would have," Robert said.  "But if I made it easier then I'm glad."

 

"You always make things easier.  That's why I married you."

 

"Speaking of which," Robert said.  He lifted his hand, pulling Aaron's ring from his finger.  Aaron held out his hand to let Robert put it back – where it belonged.  "Shall we go?"

 

Aaron nodded, kissed Robert gently, then walked around to the passenger side.  "You know that this tag isn't the most... sexy thing ever, right?"

 

"If I spend tonight focused on your ankle then I'm losing my touch," Robert grinned as they got in.

 

He started the car but they didn't move for a moment.

 

"You OK?" Aaron asked, reaching over and putting a hand on his thigh.

 

"Don't leave me again.  Please."

 

"Never," Aaron said.  "This is... this is our start."

**Author's Note:**

> Come talk to me on [my Tumblr](http://beautifulhigh.tumblr.com)


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